When I say I support women to have 'positive' births, many ask what that actually is? The internet defines it as "a birth in which a woman feels she has freedom of choice, access to accurate information, and that she is in control, powerful and respected." This is a useful starting point, but it can still seem a little obtuse. Others may see a positive birth as the opposite of a 'negative' birth experience. One in which there is no trauma.
So it got me thinking how I would define it? And the more I thought - the more I rhymed! I blame reading too much of Julia Donaldson's books to my toddler! So here is my take on 'What is a Positive Birth?'
What is a 'Positive' Birth?
Is it a natural birth? Or an induced birth?
A caesarean birth? Or a water birth?
Or a stay at home birth? Or a stay in bed birth?
Or is it something more?
Is it a birth under bright theatre lights?
Or is it a birth beneath the stars?
Is it a birth with glowing fairy lights?
Or is it a birth in your car?
Is it a birth with candles flickering?
Or perhaps a birth with your pets?
Do you have to hire a Doula?
To have a birth you will never forget?
Is it a birth where things go perfectly to plan?
Or is it a birth with complications?
Is it a birth where you don't have any drugs?
Or is it one with all the medications?
Is feeling informed important?
Is it better to be in the know?
Or should you just trust your instincts and hope?
Is it better to go with the flow?
Is it a birth where you feel respected?
Or a birth where your voice is loud?
A birth where you feel confident?
Or a birth where you feel proud?
Do you have to be a feminist?
Can you have one if you're Queer?
What if you are classed 'high risk?'
What makes it a 'Positive' birth is unclear.
Or, can a Positive Birth be ALL of these things?
However you want, with all the things that you bring?
The person who decides must have a clue!
Or, wait - is the person who decides, YOU?